Moved on

On March 31st last year I wrote about the process that I was to be put through to bring forward my post puberity s3xuality and expression learning to act on s3xual needs to bring that side of me more into line with something more like my peers.

As a matter of interest I did take one these emergent tests to see just where and how things had moved on to.
 

You are that rare species of sissy: submissive and dirty but with a measure of restraint that marks you out as the perfect maid or secretary to serve an alpha mistress. 

Most sissies are either too c*m thirsty (and act in an unseemly manner) or too frightened to perform or*l/an*l when push comes to shove. 

You however have the perfect little mouth/slit to serve your superiors with modest efficiency. 

You're h0rny....but controlled; dirty...but honest; and are clearly cognizant of what is acceptable behaviour and what is not.

It is obvious I have moved forward so I should be recognized as a person who should be included in s3xual discussion and capable of consenting to s3xual intercourse respecting my additional needs because of what had happened to me.

Miss D had this to say last year "When you can get to the point where you want to be sexual in a feminine way and learn to do so, then the pathway going forward is quite clear. For most gurls, that seals their destiny. It really doesn't have much to do with whether your partner is male or female then...

Why don't you just say it, you are attracted to men. So simple...  x x wants what men can do to them."

That's one way of putting it. I've accepted my  s3xual cravings and innate sexuality and I am glad for what was done to me

Being an emotional real inner kid

 For me what people call age regression has a different kind of a meaning, it's not that may not involve age playing in the sense of not being, not acting as an adult but rather while some play with characters with very fixed characteristics that may include a specific age not unlike most other kinds of role playing to me it's not role playing.

That is because I have a  "emotionally real inner kid"  who has a part in this which involves a very deep and personal connection when in age play that any adult sense of self isn't there so what you have is a fragile side of me that is looking for healing through this and so not only has child-like vulnerabilities through being at a developmental level a child but additional ones because a person in such a situation such as mentor, 'Foster parent' or Caregiver to being hurt by careless individuals who aren't sensitive to my needs being with them.

To that extent as far as is possible then for all intents and purposes, the hearts of inner children such as me should be treated with as much sensitivity as you would treat a real, biological child even if the law says the outer wrapping is 'adult'. 

The relating pattern will always be that of grown up, parent or guardian  to the child me so when you are involved at such a level emotionally to me, it needs to be an emotional commitment that is for the long haul and not just dropped when the next object of attention comes along.

When you do, you may very well be breaking the heart of someone who looked to you to protect them, to take care of you, to guard you. When that person vanishes suddenly and it has, it is disruptive to the healing process as an inner child I'm undergoing, and it does more damage than simply leaving a role playing site or just some girlfriend with which you were previously associated. 

Naruto Shippuden Vol.5 & 6 with The Galaxy Railways

While some no doubt have been checking if they still have a neighbourhood after this weeks disturbances that I'll keep a dignified silence on least anyone get the wrong idea, apart from being pawley -again - which is why this entry is kinda short, I had a dvd come that I'd put off due to other much more expensive stuff I wanted to get a few months back. Such is life!

Naruto is a series I've enjoyed since starting the Shippendun series to which you'll find previous entries dotted about this blog, this volume No.5 which thankfully comes as 13 episodes on two discs in a single dvd case.

I really really dislike single volumes discs of the four episode types we used to get and some Japanese companies are forcing their overseas distributors to do as with Vampire knight and K-On!

This latest installment, Volume 5, follows Naruto our ninja, who is troubled by nightmares after his second failed attempt to bring Sasuke home. While recovering in the hospital Kakashi,, suggests a new training regime for Naruto that puts him in touch with his wind chakra nature.

Here we go to Volume 6 of this long running series. In the village Hidden in the Leaves, ninja reign supreme, and school is literally a battlefield. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura are teenage classmates and ninja in training, working together -of sorts! - under the instruction of their teacher, Kakashi. 

Sasuke is training to win revenge...Sakura is training to win Sasuke...And Naruto, the class clown, insists that he ll become the greatest ninja in the World! Nothing like self belief now is there?

THE GALAXY RAILWAYS

 "The Galaxy railways" is an adventure series set in as the title suggest on the Galaxy Railways, linking all the galaxies together by railroad with a team of crack railway security people, the SDF, whose job it is to keep them safe for terrorists and the like.

Surprisingly this title has never been issued in the UK but can be bought from UK Amazon as well as Amazon.com and as I've always loved things about railways as adventure stories or actual journeys from boyhood this'll do fine.

Funimation in the States has a budget line called S.A.V.E for older titles so for those whose dvd player will do Region 1 discs you can save a bit too while building a collection and that series included this title

You and enjoying "control"

What often seems not to make sense is that while on the one hand you definitely wish to appear feminine to the point you might get an outfit or a few garments somehow you don't "jump" and strangely you feel the need for a female to give you a makeover on their terms.

Everything starts with panties, god, I'm wearing pretty panties like that right now but I used to imagine myself being "forced" to as much as I liked them deep down.

Now things can go a number of ways of which one would be to an adult little gurl, a sissy who loves being dressed and treated as a little gurl with just a bossy boots mummy figure whose domination was more a "you do as I say" adult to child way rather than anything in the adult range.

Moving more into the twilight area, you might be dressed more like an older teen or a young adult in which instance you'll find yourself being kept in mini skirts and tops and they might a run on of some the domination it would have some room for a more adult sexual side.

Adult Little Gurl or more Young Adult Gurl, some things will always be there such as having to wait, maybe with a stuffie or dolly before they pull your panties down for a good hard spanking as sissies of all ages are spanked.

Things that turn me on when they’re said in a stern voice:

“No.”

“Behave.”

“Look at me when I’m speaking to you.”

“Don’t you dare.”

“Get over my knee.”

“You’ll do as you’re told.”

“I’ll beat your ass.”

“Watch your mouth.”

“On your knees.”

“Open. Suck.”

Anything that ends with “young lady.“ 

James Taylor

Way back in time in my early childhood there was guy I didn't know much about but to which I heard this record 'You've Got A Friend' which I think was the first 45 I ever bought myself and so begun a love affair with some of his singles.

Because it was the early 70's I had no albums by him and so many decades after the event, I'm building up a small collection of his albums for the first time on cd a number of which are from labels specializing in higher than average sound quality.

James was born in Boston, M.A. on March 12th 1948 moving to The South in his childhood, learning to Cello and the guitar by 1960.

In 1967 following episodes of depression he moved to London, England making contact with Peter Asher the A&R man of Apple records - the company founded by no less than The Beatles - and was signed on the strengths of his demonstration recordings. Whilst there he wrote Caroline on my mind and released an album James Taylor on Apple.

In October 1969 He signed a new contract with Warner Brothers and with help from Songstress Carole King released the album Sweet Baby James in February 1970 with the hits single 'Fire and Rain'.

This album is held to be a masterpiece of folk rock winning many wards over the years.

In April1971 he issued Mud Slide Slim and the Blue Horizon that featured the single by him I first heard with backing vocals by Joni Mitchell that went top ten even in England.My current copy is the stock European issue from the 1980's although I hear Audio Fidelity are planning on a high quality reissue soon.

The concept album One Man Dog was issued in November 1972 with the lead off single Don't let Me Be Lonely Tonight' but this only reached #18 on the US charts which was a sign the album wasn't selling well.

Much the same followed Walking Man issued June 1974 which only sold 300,000 copies in the States with the title track issued on 45 missing the hot 100.

I recently got JT his 1977 album which was re-issued by Mobile Fidelity on cd.

Girl Guides or Scouts?

 

I am sure it must happen as Scout or Girl Guiding groups close in an area that some sort of support is offered from "the other side" although whither not that may include membership would be debatable as GirlGuiding doesn't allow Boys in and as I understand it doesn't see being a feminine boy as compatible but non binary and pre and post op transsexuals are.

Personally I feel Girl Guides may be the better option for the sissy gurl cos you know at that age you're not a boy, god knows I did back then.

It is interesting looking at the uniforms the older girl guiding units don't have skorts (skirts with built in shorts) as an option although brownies do and Scouts which is co-ed today doesn't and beyond cubs pushes "Activity Trousers" for all and no skirts or skorts which I think is remiss for an organization supposedly inclusive.

Skorts would make a good option for busy and out of door activity for both girls, sissy gurls and feminine boys.

Blue Peter in the 70's

 There's a fair chance some of you may well remember having these annuals during your childhood as keen viewers of the BBC TV Blue Peter program. 

It may surprise you to know I also have a number that are co-related to the period I was (officially) a child having not just information about what was shown during that 12 month period, but also on the news of the day such as with this edition information about the US space carrier, Skylab and some good illustrated bits about British History.

I was and remain an avid fan of this show from watching for myself around 1970 with my brothers acquiring some of their annuals as they outgrew them and having my own still.

It all helps to jog my memory back to the year and what mattered to me as a child during it such as the arts and crafts which at all the schools I attended we did.

Feature on that edition John Noakes a Northern English presenter during the show up to June 1978 with Shep, the Border collie to the left of him.