Lessons learned

It's been a odd sort of a week away, in some ways it's like you're still not if you 'should' even spend time with others and the weather has not really given to spending a lot of time on treks of several miles which is what I would of liked.

On the other hand if lockdown had broken some habits from that messy past still further by virtue of just having those routines so any kind of hold just ebbed away the one thing that could be said was I was now going purely by my own sense of self.

I travelled out as I intended to as nothing less than an adult little sissy having ditched just before the end of the second lockdown a more cute shoulder bag for a plain one unlike the very last time I'd been been away.

I only had girls sports kit with me with full boys uniform with a change of shirts, knickers and traditional socks and a pair of shorts plus a blazer that I made of point of wearing.

I just felt so comfortable in my own skin as that eternal little sissy gurl of ten feeling as if I had no cares in world looking as if the person next to me was my minder in charge dealing with anything remotely groan up

I felt alive and very much as that sissy gurl.

Here I am resting.

My shorts were traditional David Luke ones taken up to a inside leg of four inches which is very close to the length they were when I was at junior school and took away any notional appearance wise of being adult because I looked like the sissy I am.

My dysphoria was "cured".

TAMMY IS NOTHING BUT A BOY BY SEX AND A SISSY GURL BY GENDER.

THEY NEEDED TO MADE TO WEAR HUR GREY SHORTENED SHORTS SO SHE FEELS BOTH AT ONE WITH THEIR GENDER AND HUR TRUE AGE PLUS EVERYONE SEES THEM AS JUST A LITTLE SISSY GURL IN A GROWN UP WORLD TO BE TAKEN CARE OFF.

THAT DOESN'T MEAN THEY CANNOT BE IN A DRESS FOR MOST OF THE TIME UNLIKE IN HUR ORIGINAL CHILDHOOD SHE WAS THAT WEEK BUT SHE'LL JUST REMAIN THAT SISSY GURL IN IT AS PART OF WHOLE HER, NEVER A GIRL EITHER.

TAMMY IS JUST A SISSY GURL.

The hot start to the School Hols with my teddy bears

 

There has seldom been a moment from being by birth age a boy to remaining so throughout this life where teddy bears have not featured in some capacity.

From objects I slept with to things I have this deep need to cuddle up to, stroke, talk with and hug they've always been in it and in all sizes from the dinkiest to really big ones.

Life without them would be unbearable!

It's not long before I go away for a few days which is as well as the last couple of days have been really really hot feeling like a damp exhausted rag than my usual self. 

Part of the preparations for all that involved having my hair cut which with all the other stuff is a rather sensitive subject but I decided to get it back to more like it was with a short cut which keeps some of natural curliness in but is tidy as it doesn't take much for my hair get messy around the ends.

With it being like it has I've been in skirts and given it's school hols for many  shorter shorts and skorts with t shirts and short cure girls ankle socks.

I'm back to how it all was now and I'm glad of it.

The hot start to the School Hols featuring a comic

It's not long before I go away for a few days which is as well as the last couple of days have been really really hot feeling like a damp exhausted rag than my usual self. 

Summer Specials were a thing back in the day I liked from my favourite comics and this year apart from the staples of the Beano and Dandy's I have this new special that isn't really a summer special as such other than it came out on June 10th

Comics aimed at girls were once a boom industry, supporting dozens of titles and boasting sales of hundreds of thousands of copies a week.

Published in the 1970s and ‘80s, Tammy and Jinty covered almost every facet of girls’ lives – school, sports, friendship, rivalry, romance, the apocalypse, ghosts, witchcraft, parallel universes, aliens and everything in between!

Tammy & Jinty Remixed pays tribute to this history while also blazing a new trail for the future where comics are for everyone, as writers and artists take old comics and characters as their starting point and reimagine them, or create brand new worlds.

They have for this mixture of stories from the last two Jinty specials added some stories from the original editions which is way way cool.

Getting back to this going away with being locked down this long I've had to find a few things that do work together like my new blue blazer and matching skirt too at short notice as we've only just been given the all clear to be together.

Lockdown has been trying and put an end spending time visiting each other and going away for days on end but recent relaxations are allowing it return even if we must be cautious with this virus about.

We're back to how it all was now and I'm glad of it.

The traditional side coexists

This could well of been a scene from my childhood past, going around a vintage usually steam railway getting all upfront and personal with the working parts of the locomotive, smelling the grease  lubricating it all so it all works smoothly.

You'd find yourself transfixed so much by it you'd be almost in a daydream, with no idea of the time or if your mates were still around or drifted off somewhere else like the little souvenir shop pouring over things to buy, a kit, a picture or postcard perhaps.

This is integrated today with my feminine side which makes sense.

That won't be happening this week as it's felt with it being very busy there may be more risks involved than desirable given we even got as far as going away and sharing a property but all being well we'll be be able to do so in the future.