On Gender

It is heading towards Christmas and  new year and bearing in mind  I established a Tumblr earlier in the year you start to hear much discourse around the who question of identities and who belongs in what camp as it were.

I have never made any claim to be anything other than me even if at times I had been playing catch up with all the terms and definitions as I lack much of that to try to explain just where I fit in with all of it.

Despite the best attempts of others put impose a narrative more suited to them on me, the one thing I have learned this year is I unequivocally identify as a boy at the biological sexual level and is a part of my social gender.

I have no desire to be or become a female because I like my body and moreover my feminine side is uber female and goes off the normal female scale.

It is however quite true to say some of my interests and traits  are traditionally seen as feminine which was an issue certainly in my schoolboy years although today some are seen more acceptable for boys to do or pursue.

I will not dodge what some have seen as the elephant in the room which is to do like to gender present at variance to that of boys in skirts and dresses more suiting of child rather than that of an adult.

That can show in wearing the skirts and dresses of  school uniform traditionally associated with girls at times.

I am also a gurl with a kawaii crush liking cute t shirts and socks who loves wearing soft pretty and  frilly panties under hur skirts.

Some have suggested that those feminine sides mean I am of the female gender or I'm a transgendered person.

People do when it comes to social roles and interests differ when measured against stereotypical norms so the sporty girl or the ballet loving boy are still girl and boy respectively.

To me that's more routed in gender roles and expectations as much as sadly some people are left feeling "it would be easier if I was [insert opposite gender].

The nature of transsexuality is however it's not just the leaving of the social trappings of gender but implies you also wish to leave the body you were in because you want/desire the physical form of the gender you feel you are and not just at the point of wanting to 'fit in'.

People have defied convention expressing themselves or even presenting outwardly as a gender different to the one recorded without any surgery sometimes for short periods on occasions for most of their lives.

In my case I know I'm neither male or female by gender and actually I fall more under sissy gurl even with a few variants within that which I discovered some years ago.

I today call myself a Sissy Gurl or go under feminine boy as any grown up sexuality is totally different from your sense of gender anyway.