Going forward staying the same

The way that it goes sometimes can be odder than you might expect when you look at places where people who like for various reasons to return to their childhood both when it comes to the sorts of things they did and even how they would of dressed.

For instance what would you of expected of a site that was mainly for and about those who like to return to boyhood and school boy pasts?

Normally I'd expect a lot of talk about more overly masculine hobbies, relating patterns that may be more physical such as play fighting and rough housing and that sense of being a group of lads together.

Equally you'd expect to see more around boys casual and especially school uniforms with short and long trousers.

Imagine then to find that when asked about other sorts of clothes beyond boys school uniform for a number to freely volunteer that they like and have worn "girls" school wear such as skirts, pinafore dresses and gym knickers.

That really was so unexpected  so actually people like me do exist in those spaces even if on the surface they appear to be very much traditional boys only spaces.

Chores for Little Gurls

Today I thought I would give some thought to things a little or middle either in relationship or living with someone even on occasional basis can be encouraged to do for themselves

Own area

Making own bed

Getting clothes out for the next day

Hanging up own clothes neatly after wearing/washing

Making sure worn clothes are available for washing

Keeping own spaces tidy

Helping in the home 

Fixing own breakfast

Setting tables with cutlery, mats, glasses and cold refreshing drink

Clearing away and washing up afterward

Tidying away in other spaces after you

Helping with vacuuming

Feeding pets

Sometimes it can be easy to drift into a pattern where other people may not expect you to do (or be able to do)  these things which doesn't help you either with trying be more responsible and independent and may in a low key nagging way begin to undermine a relationship.

It also is the case that within reason, people shouldn't try to do that too, even if you  as a little or middle have a disability or two regardless of like a  number of folk  you may not of had to do much if any of these things in past yourself.

A reflective moment

Every day starts out pretty much as any other for most of us unless we're planning on going somewhere special we follow routines feeling confident that today will be like yesterday and no doubt tomorrow with a change here or there but otherwise of itself uneventful.

So it's hardly a surprise we become accustomed to the idea that everything will remain 'just so' which to be honest is one thing I sure loved when I was younger, the whole certainty with its sense of well-being from repeating that pattern week after week.

Every so often though, something comes along and knocks it over. You feel lost if not numb and bewildered too as it seemed to going along so well.

It is okay to feel that way, sad things happen, we hurt and a good number of us are hurting right now. 

I can't speak for all of you but things often seem to go in cycles and my last lot of cycles have seen me  do different things, learn and improve on skills that I've struggled with, form new and more helpful friendships and understand more about myself and others too.

All those things can and are helping me deal with this because they've given not only ears to listen and understand how I may feel but also the strength to carry on when I just feel like lying there crying (and I know that feeling so well).

You know, those we miss so much would never of wanted us to stay like that forever and you might imagine this friendly nudge coming out urging you on, reminding you can start again, even if we find it hard.

Personally, I feel it's helpful to think about those things that I have reason to be thankful for over the years from the situations that just appeared from nowhere and to which I had no real plan for. 

Just thinking about it, my life has changed quite a lot in the last ten years for the better and much of that isn't down to some super medical recovery on my part but more because I've been working on dealing with more how it's handed out to me, making the most of it smiling even through some of the Meh moments.

It is easy to get into a cycle of beating yourself up when things aren't going to plan, thinking we are useless (been there and done it) or feeling guilty over things that maybe we didn't have that much of a say over but I'm going to try to get on with life the best I can from now on.

That's a much of lesson from my childhood that I can use today and maybe it's of some use to you.

Going forward staying the same

The way that it goes, on the day I was out for a good stroll taking some pictures for another blog as I encountered high school children returning to school after the weekend.

One boy interviewed said being missing so much of junior 4 (aka year six) left him feeling as he transitioned to the first form as we'd of called it of high school kind if funny and too young to be in that year group.

Child development comes on at different rates and he probably is right in saying he doesn't feel ready for that step but as ever the needs of "the system" tend to prevail as he may of benefited from being held back a year to catch up.

I know from admittedly my rather more severe mismatched development I always felt a few years young emotionally and in general maturity from my peers.

That's why this treatment and being back in the sort of uniform I had in my last year at Juniors taken much further up than what is customary now works for me and that will lead into other areas.