Recapitation

Something like a recapitation of what has been learned so far in that while some people may feel is strong sense of disconnect from how they may see their social identity and how that is viewed all that can be changed is the outward appearance at cost not just financial but in terms of damage to your own heath.

Gender realignment surgery as it's called has substantial health risks   and does not change your actual sex leaving you internally a mismatch of female parts such as breasts but prostrates, no ovaries and womb.

A few people may need that but many are more conflicted about gender roles and expectations which are a lot different than your sex and working on them may make more sense.

Not a few people who are "little" who do think in terms of passing as another gender don't actually want to be an adult of it and really while at some event consideration should be given for that role in social gatherings, in everyday life they really are not that sex and no alterations are needed.

A man who presents as a girl in his spare time is a man ultimately.

For me what some misread as dysphoria was actually the painful feelings I had about being on the inside developmentally  a much younger person and how because of my age and how I presented that clashed.

That was something that could be addressed without to much difficulty if in effect we took the decision to return me to childhood with the protections of grown ups.

Going along with other peoples ideas around regression cos it was all that was on offer doesn't make sense because really I know and do clearly identify as a sissy gurl being neither a girl or boy by gender so regression for me is LSG (Little Sissy Gurl) even if I need spaces in to let my masculine side out as my gender fluidity requires it.

 

The nature of that is you do have the development of  at least an adolescent.

Elton John: Rocket Man II

The last time I looked at this topic was December last and since then I have acquired a few more "new to me discs" originally issued in the late 80's, early 90's by specialty label Mobile Fidelity (MFSL).

We'll kick off with 1971's Madman Across The Water recorded at Trident studios, London which I never previously owned on cd, the home of Levon (a track on the MCA version of Greatest Hits Vol:2) and Tiny Dancer both which good examples of the longer, more laid back style he had then.  

It was the first album Elton only played piano on and not another keyboard instruments.

This, very much Elton's first attempt at a Wild West feel concept album recorded at Trident, doesn't possess a single record hit but features such songs as "Talking Old Soldiers" which does get close to capturing the sense of comradeship people who fought in the forces have and the haunting Where To Now St. Peter.  Country Comfort was lifted off as a 45 release but failed to chart.

Issued on October 1970 it's album I've always had a lot of time for and this sound much smoother than my older MCA cd from the late 80's.

This one 1972's Honky Cháteau named after 18th century French chateau it was recorded in , is more well known being the home of Rocket Man and Honky Cat as well as I Think  Going To Kill Myself which I remember him sing at the Rossayna Hall  (sp?) in the then USSR around the late 70's as well as Hercules, the album closer.

This sounds much better than the 80's MCA cd.

Much to my pleasant surprise, actually these gold discs weren't as expensive as I had expected something no doubt to with the state of the economy and some sellers preparedness to price to sell rather than the three figure madness previously seen on Ebay.

Finally back to regular issues that just happen to sound great and this, the 1985 West German DJM cd version of the 1973 album Don't Shoot Me... , home of so many fine songs  such as as Crocodile Rock, Elderberry Wine and Daniel which while not quite making up to the standard of a specialty gold remaster, nevertheless is very close sound much smoother on Daniel than either the MCA U.S. edition and much less processed compared to the 1995 "The Classic years" remaster.

Past into present

 It's been a long time since I started it being an unashamedly littles blog even if bits may have come from other accounts elsewhere talking very much about what interests me as well as my life as one and part of the reason for this was to help explain what it's about and to encourage others in accepting this part of them.

When you can, you feel more at ease being who you really are regardless of what gender background (if any) you may have because the funny thing is every adult (a groan up) has a childhood base that the other areas of your life are built on so if you don't feel at ease with your younger side to the point perhaps of denying it, then quite often it trips you up. 

If you are transgendered, the whole identification issue can lead to a situation where your past childhood gender is effectively discarded as if you land as the man or woman you are without those bonds that those assigned at birth have and importantly drawn from

It is common place in today's society for example for woman to hold on to the interests and passions of their girlhood without any question to their abilities in the world of work. Is that a bad thing?

Many of best creative ideas it seems to me come from that childlike state of mind (is it no accident so many in the creative industries are like that), prepared to think out of the box, drawing inspiration from their pasts?

What you may do with this childlike side is very much your own affair but it may involve wearing more girlish  styles of clothes (and what options we have!), possibly some kind of play or the rediscovery of pastimes you really enjoyed such as sports or arts/craft work.

The one thing I have learned thinking last night while together with a group of littles was the sense of personal  innerpeace I've found since, the feeling free to express my real feeling and emotions by simply being me rather than a reduced down 'groan up' version that simply left me sad. And to be with others, contributing and sharing in that fun.

Who wouldn't want to rest in frills?

Magazine

A few days ago a replacement copy of a much loved Heart album arrived.

The first thing to note is that 'sash' on the top left hand corner as it was announced recently by the President of Audio Fidelity that they would no longer be manufacturing 24Kt gold cds, anymore a carry over from the days of DCC, because of escalating costs and erratic supplies.

To me at least the gold plating was never an issue - it's the actual sound  from the mastering that counted - but I guess the gold plating did suggest 'Gold Standard' for some.
Instead they're using from now on exclusively a disc with a regular cd layer and a high definition super audio cd layer for special players instead.

This album came out in 1978 originally with the consent of Heart who had changed labels but they returned to alter the mix and re-record parts and is a mixture of a few new songs and older unreleased recordings with a few live tracks.

Notwithstanding it's origins, the track Heartless became a  top 30 single and the set does show clearly just how talent they had become covering Without You and I've Got The Music In Me distinctively.

I originally had the lp and bought the U.S. Capitol XDR tape re-issue in the summer of 1986.

It was issued on cd by Capitol who had acquired the rights to Mushroom Records recordings  in the late 1980's in a so-so transfer with next to no album art but this edition by Steve Hoffman for Audio Fidelity sounds very smooth and is to be much preferred today.

Soulville

Seeing it was my birthday recently I decided to review my collection of  Soul cds which go back a good number of years I started from the end of  tape and record era in my music buying and filling in a few gaps.

You have to remember I was around in the clunky fade up and down era of 8 tracks tapes in the car and home plus FM stereo stations in the metro districts that influenced my tastes to the point the first records and the later cds reflected my likes so for instance take the first artist, Mr Wilson Pickett was better to known to me for his 70's songs like Soft Soul Boogie Man which I have on the "Take Your Pleasure Where You Find It" compilation cd and compilation 8 tracks of that Soul Train era than his 60's material I had as a child!

So I was lacking a cd of his bigger 60's hits like Mustang Sally so I bought the "A man and a half" 2 cd set of those 60's hits most on this disc also are the mono hit versions rather than wonky stereo remakes on the current individual albums.

On the other hand I did get in the early 90's a 20 track mainly stereo compilation of Otis Redding including I Can't Turn You Loose, Tramp, Try A Little Tenderness and (Sittin' on) The Dock Of The Bay but wanted the original albums in their mono versions so bought this box set of the five that came out before his death after his appearance at the  Monterey festival in December 1967.

It brings together the albums remastered as the separate mid 90's Rhino remasters series in a box with card lp covers.

The music of Sam Cooke was something I heard quite a bit of on the radio being championed by Rod Stewart and the Rolling Stones and this set covering his solo work taking in Twisting The Night Away, Shake, A Change Is Gonna Come and Cupid originally issued in 2003 by Abkco is the best sounding bettering 1987's The Man His Music issued on RCA which for a long time the default cd compilation of choice.

This one's where the Soulville entry title came from as that track recorded for Columbia in the 60's is one that closed out the 8 track of "Black Explosion" with soul hits from the late 60's and early 70's I played rather a lot and got a cd with her Columbia recordings like Soulville early on in the cd era.

I had picked up the UK Global 2 cd "Greatest Hits" set in the late 90's for her Atlantic material and later Arista recordings but the tracks switch era rather glaring across the discs for me so I got this newly re-issued and recompiled Queen of Soul 4 cd box  set which just focus's on the 1967-1976 Atlantic era running in chronological order thru such songs as Respect, Call Me, I say a Little Prayer and so on with the earlier recordings in their mono original form.

To take in that later era covering songs like Jump To It, Who's Zoomin' Who and I Knew You Were Waiting I got cheaply the 1980-1994 Greatest Hits single cd.

Much more straightforward.

Ray Charles: I managed to track down the two specialty DCC His Greatest Hits cds cheaply for songs like Hit The Road Jack from the period he recorded for ABC-Paramount which took in the ground breaking Modern Sounds in Country and Western album. 

The mastering legend that is Steve Hoffman redid this a few years later with a slightly different selection using a tubed tape machine  and issued on Gold but this one done with solid state machine onto aluminum in 1987 is still really good sounding and cheap to buy used!

K-On!

 

The more seasoned readers of this blog know, I like animes rather a lot although of necessity I'm selective as to which I collect in series form because of the sheer expense

and the second volume

I first started following this series a few years back at least in part because it tickets all the right boxes for me as we have a school setting complete with uniforms, who go on to form a Pop music group to keep the light music after school club going and it's funny reminding me of the school clubs I took part in, writing up the plot outlines at the time.

This series is a year update on the first seeing the members progressing towards graduation, potentially putting the groups composition at risk and  also wanting to recruit new members to pass on the legacy.

The emotions would be familiar to anyone so it's easy to related to and the storyline is easy to follow.

Each set comprises of two discs in a pack which is UK distributor Manga entertainments format of choice.

The mix and match day

Mixing and matching the two sides of me is a balancing act because I am one biological sex and just one person in that body as much as I'm gender fluid and alternate between masculine and feminine interests and sometimes time gender presentation.

Yes really, as hard as it may seem to some I never really get any older because I've never really stopped feeling ten with the same birthday wishes whatever it may say on my birth certificate and as for feeling old, well I've had aches and pains in childhood so to me even that don't age me either. I still feel animated when I wake up on the day!!!

Barbie was my heroine as a sissy gurl for having so many pretty clothes, looking beautiful but having an exciting life with a career of her very own.

 As you can see Cuddles the Tatty Teddy is here in all it's super huggableness.

Also here and I did mention it while I was away last month I think, is the 1960 Disney movie version of Pollyanna with Hayley Mills and coming soon will be The Parent Trap and That Darn Cat! in the same series on Region 2 dvd.

In what is the month of my birth we should give thanks for being stabilized more than I was able to mix feminine interests when dressed as a little in their I'm in a junior girls  pinafore dress as much as engaging with masculine ones when in short trousers

They are two sides of one sissy gurl.