What it is

 

What this whole thing, this whole blog was about really is finding the real you from all the attempts at gender, age and other social conformities I and countless others were and have been subjected to from the moment we emerged from the womb.

For some it is relatively simple - they just were boys or girls who became men and women within the mainstream of what socially at least it meant.

With me it was more complex liking my physical boyish body but loving to wear clothes associated with girls and even to share in their interests when that of boys around me did not because of being so very feminine.

It takes extra layers on for not wanting nor feeling like a man but just as much not being a woman either because I never felt an adult or even really an older child most of the time being pretty much a child for life mentally at least.

The gain of the last few years has been being that sissy gurl adult but child in his dress or short trousers playing with his dollies, reading comics, letting the grown up world go by.

Equality for all

 A changed world is what strikes those of us brought up in the nineteen seventies and eighties where we are making some progress in the ability to present as you are in school or in scouting, girl, boy, non binary or transgendered.

Today, while inheritance doesn't have to, it remains more usual for a fathers business affairs to be taken over by a son and until the recent changes in succession laws, the first born male took over from the reigning monarch but families live on with their sons names.

Many of us would argue the advancement of equal opportunity employment, the ability of women to open and run bank accounts in their own right and of equal pay were right and proper in a society that values all.

Some trends in education, child care and the breakdown in traditional parenting however seem to disadvantage boys in particular and it seems to me be be just as right in its way for these to be addressed in order to raise a generation of boys to be the best men as it was to pave the way for girls having a bigger role and stake as women.

The same but different - being you

One reason I have to have a blog rather than a Tumblr is Tumblr doesn't just rightly clamp down on threats but also on anything that contradicts its right on "woke" culture even though it's supposed to be a social blogger tool for all regardless of views.

Being on there talking and sharing my childhood experiences helped me understand me and get to grips with who and what I was really about, having conversations with boys apart from the stuff at one site but because in part their opposition to anything that's not pro gender questioning and skewed towards modern feminism, they axed all my original accounts.

Well I'm post gender questioning  having moved on from gender questioning and now being seen as non binary with sissy gurl elements because we got to really what I was about.

My sex is male and socially I am a mixture of masculine and feminine gendered hetrosexual so you might think it was okay to be gender affirming as a boy but on there it wasn't at all.

That's the thing: While I respect the rights of others to be as they are because I share space with them doesn't mean I should not  act feminine or have to have anything to do with things that are 'girly' that I'm not hard wired to because I do have a feminine side as a sissy gurl

My own part boyish nature in all its forms should be accepted as part within my own sissy gurl gender identity rather than being denounced is best channelled in areas that benefit everyone and people should be appointed because of their ability not trying to mirror society demographics as good as having a mix can be.

Respecting those space also should include respecting my right as a Sissy Gurl to present in skirts and dresses as a matter of course, being accepted for what I truly am.

My wearing a skirt doesn't make me a girl either.

Spaces that have existed for male and females alone because they provide safe spots for free frank conversation should be respected  even if most things are co-ed.

There is merit in single sex youth movement units even if two of the opposite sex do share facilities and take part in exercises together because it helps develop each to their full potential learning from older members and leaders of their own gender not just skills but also how to be the best grown man and women they can.

We aren't all the same but are complementary and all sides deserve respect as the gender  that they are from the one they are not.

Recast to the past

Experience has tended to show me the way in which you present can have a strong effect on how you feel.

The word "vulnerability"  Tommy a LB at one site used to describe that feeling of having so much wind  feeling the more exposed legs comes very much into mind as I did walk out today in them as a van pulls in sharp next to me with a typical big builders build winding down the window asking where the nearest place that does hot drinks and sandwiches was.

Good grief, I felt all of nine or ten just standing there answering him with old "stranger danger" messages ringing in my head in shorts of the same length as these mentally cast back to that era hoping I'd  dealt with in a way mummy would be pleased with.


I'm just a little sissy gurl.

More Rumer

 It's not the week most of us have been wanting to be entering looking toward current affairs but as we can't do much about that we might as well focus on what keeps us going and that for some us includes music.

The artist Rumer to whom a good number of first caught in 2010 with Seasons Of My Soul has recently returned with a album that collects fifteen superb songs by the acclaimed American songwriter Hugh Prestwood routed in Southern folklore of stories told from the heart.

Many of these songs have not been commercially recorded and the arrangements and production by Fred Mollin makes the most of them while Rumer's voice continues to remind us of late great Karen Carpenter.

The song Ghost In This House is a favourite of mine with its folksy feel.

Recommended.

Past childhood into new adult-childhood

There are lots of different ways in which the way we express our little selves of which one of the more obvious is how outside of our adult lives we elect to present ourselves through what we wear.

Whatever it may be, it is always to drawn a line under what may be classed as being seen as an adult (although of course that doesn't alter The Law) and to resemble outwardly our little selves.

To varying degrees what it is inwardly our sense of littleness which for a few such myself is always there and so is involuntary and permanent would show just on its own whatever we we be wearing but we feel more at one with it more when we resemble our little selves physically.

There is I feel an issue at heart of littles communities  that really causes much heartache and that is the extent that many seem to locked in the cultural norms of the seventies and sixties where boys only do certain things and dress one way and ditto girls and this can apply even to those who see themselves as transgender.

I was more with the Free To Be Me ideals where we looked beyond a persons sex and said you can do and wear what you wish regardless of your sex even if you may thing you're in the wrong body.

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Some still say in effect girls can only be littles if in skirts and dresses and boys can only be one in short trousers or those awful longs even if today's boys and girls may dress very differently and have more mixed interests.

As a feminine sissy gurl I have the right to wear a dress and be that gurl and girls who prefer to wear shorts when playing shouldn't be told they cannot be near people at events if they wear shorts cos they're not girls and the people associate shorts with boys.

It's easy to understand a boy who was ill treated perhaps in them for wishing to wear a skirt may have certain associations but what right does that give them to prevent another being themselves not least if they were bullied by girls in dresses and pereline socks?

Peoples behaviour has nothing to with what they wear while in it, the attitude is in their minds not their clothes and surely we need to stop treating people badly just because they wear one sort of attire.

Sometimes people argue about  you can have parts in your Little Space that are not of the era you were brought up in as if they are not emotionally an authentic part of you so that if say you were brought up in say the nineteen fifties, you cannot have plushies or have say books from other eras.

In my regressed world you can add some things into it so say teddy bears can be complemented by say a dinosaur Plushie because it's function and utility to is the same, you play with it, it comforts you as hold and hug it as the inner child you are.

In much the same way to read say the books of Jacqueline Wilson is a part of understanding a part of contemporary childhood with the objects and experiences our age in it, that can aid me understand more of this age I'm travelling through as the hybrid adult-child I am

Equality for all

It is summer but with Covid around it certainly doesn't feel it with no one able to be away or stay with anyone overnight so I've spent my time out just exploring in the fresh air.

I've found myself thinking during this period about where things need to be for everyone including people like me to feel accepted.

Comparing how things were when I grew up in the seventies and eighties and today we can see some clear signs of progress in what we might call gender roles in society and how we can ensure people are raised to take full advantage of those opportunities.

What seems to be helping us to achieve the most we can right now in society is that people are realizing there are traits that belong to both genders, and those traits that were traditionally considered 'masculine' are there in women, and the 'feminine' traits are there in men. 

It's no longer seen as a problem when someone shows traits that are often considered to belong to the opposing gender--men cry and get upset in bad situations, or are gentle and soft holding a baby in their arms. 

Women are more and more in the positions of power (here in the UK we've had two female Prime Ministers), and taking control of rough situations.

I don't think we need to go to a society where the women are wearing the business suits and running things while the men are dolled up in short skirts with makeup and painted nails.

That's where I break with some feminists and most on the sissy fetish side.

I hold to reverse the roles completely would be just as disastrous as the way things had been run. 

Instead, we need the roles equalized and that femininity should never be seen a bad thing. 

When we can get to the point where a parent gives their child a pair of panties and a sundress to wear for the day and nobody cares whether the child is a girl or boy, the world will be a much better place.

We'll get there slowly--as the previous generations die out and the new ones grow up, acceptance of things like this grows. 

Someone who grew up with a 'macho' father becomes friends with a more feminine boy and realizes there's nothing wrong with it. 

Now, their son grows up to be accepting of both feminine and masculine things, and their child more so. 

Those of us who grew up experiencing both sides of the equation when the roles were so much more rigidly defined seem to be some of the biggest champions for equality. 

I learned firsthand that girls don't have a more difficult life compared to boys, but instead each gender faces their own difficulties and with each gender were variants such as Jane Girls like me and Tom Boys.

We have the right to be free to be me.