Getting that cubby feeling

This last week has been interesting with the usual mix of a few decades past and the current intermingled as I found memories of original childhood experienced in my second as that child in an adult body.

It has also been an interesting one for being out exploring nature, watching, feeling and hearing it intently.

I have observed the habits of Squirrels, watched on a daily basis the changes in the hue and colour of the leaves on all our local trees and a good many insects.
Indeed actually on Saturday, I observed at close quarters hundreds of Ladybirds out in the fall sun that must of emerged.

An example of the Harlequin Ladybird I saw is this one which I took a picture of while a wasp seemed to take an interest in my hat!

Wild berries were also out too although normally it is a little late in the season to see them.

While I can never be invested into the cubs nor actually be awarded the badges, this week I feel the sense of being a scout in spirit learning more their woodcraft  and scouting skills such as observation while having fun.

While at the time Cubs was the only option, really my resumption would be exclusively as a Brownie, a Brownie In Spirit with all the girl friendly traditions, promises and beliefs as a gurl.

That is where I belong and I shall work on.

The very things that are passported into the remainder of your life after that stage even after moving from having a boyhood to being a sissy gurl still benefit you.

Tv shows of the past

 

Tuesday October 16th  marked the 60th Anniversary of the British children's tv program Blue Peter that was very much a part of my childhood and I watched the one hour special edition.

Monday October 1st saw the death of Geoffrey Hayes who was the parental adult figure on the commercial ITV Network show Rainbow from 1974 through 1992 keeping Zippy,George and Bungle in order  which was supposed to be for pre-schoolers but many of us who watched were older, catching it at Lunchtimes in an era most of us didn't  didn't have video recorders.

The show had segments and one was Rod, Freddy and Jane's folk music slot which was enjoyable to listen too and matched the folk revival in the adult world in the 70's.

Age Dysphoric rant

 

Ever notice how people react with a disgusting and unwarranted amount of vitriol towards those who "don't act their age"?

Seriously, what is it about being immature that causes such nastiness in people? As long as your so-called immaturity isn't hurting anyone, why do they care? 

Everyone knows to be kind and understanding towards people with disabilities, mental illness, and so on, but have they ever stopped to think that maybe immature people can't help it either? 

So WHAT if I become obsessive over celebrities and fictional characters? So WHAT if you deem me to be "too old" for that kind of stuff? 

Why do you have to treat me like human garbage just because my interest and personality is that of a person younger than the number of years I've been alive?

It may be true for people whose current bone age up to thirty to be given some latitude having interests in Fandoms, celebrities and perhaps following some interests from their teens but my generation was pushed onto serious topics, having plushies ripped from you, prized toys prized out of your hands, discouraged from having posters.

You had to read "grown up" books which was a bloody laugh when I didn't have the reading comprehension to do so, wanting to dress as a character in film or book was called "Silly" and childish.

Just goes to show how horribly most people treat those who buck the status quo.

It gets so bad for some of us that we’re called p*dos and people say that we “act that way” to attract kids somehow. I had a disrupted childhood and have always had a fixation on toys and arts and crafts and cute things. I experience involuntary age regression and am autistic and I’m tired of being seen as cringe, creepy and even predatorial. It hurts so much. I’m just a big kid trying to relax.

That's the thing. They assume that about us, and then all rational conversation shuts down–like they don't even want to hear anything further. 

Like, how messed up in the head do you have to be that your mind automatically goes there when you hear about trans-age people? To me it sounds like THEY'RE the ones with the problem, not us. And besides, how could we be (those people) when we are kids ourselves??? As kids (with the exception of maybe the teenagers among us), it's not even possible for us to experience sexual attraction of any kind!!! We are literally CHILDREN! Stop trying to steal our innocence and turn us into monsters.

A spot of colouring

The weekend was not particularly conducive to going out with strong winds on Friday so with even bigger and stong people than myself struggling I needed to stay indoors which as you probably aware isn't something I like at all, being an outdoor boy.

One thing you can do when it is like this is colour and so I had my colouring books out on Friday.

Because I read girls books I did have and coloured this Jacqueline Wilson one based on her stories which I love to read.

Here's one I'm working on based on Brownies, the younger side of Girl Guiding which is part of the big scouting family I love.

 Normally when I colour I use Staedtler colour pencils available in the Noris Club 36 colour pack as they respond well to different pressures for shading and don't easily break in the way some cheaper ones found in convenience stores do.

They also sharpen well.

That illustration is from the a football colouring book I bought and love working through.