Where does Tammy a sissy gurl belong?

After the usual Christmas and New Year posts on here we get very much back into regular blogging on here

People sometimes give you the impression they really don't know what to quite make of you and just where you do fit in given that much of the social world does revolve around the fact there are boys and there are girls who will often break into groups that are just for them.

This works well for most people and it is really quite foolish and arrogant for anyone who doesn't fit within the overwhelming majority to expect them to totally restructure society just for us.

What I wish for is the ability to make a consistent choice  over which group I join that having done so I am not altering the very nature of it  just playing a part within that group talking about and maybe doing things within it.

And to be respected within it.

The bottom line is Tammy is  a Sissy Gurl and I know I am NOT a girl and have no inclination to want to be a girl, not least an adult Woman and I have never made it as a boy and even less as a Man.

If as was often the case at school I was in a Girls group, I deferred to them allowing the group to be a girls group that allowed a Sissy Gurl me into it saving me the bigger issues of being in Boys groups I had even less in common with because I was and am feminine.

Those girls had real authority over me but it worked for them and for me.

January edition

It's post Christmas with it's blend of more traditional things in it  and other things  and we begin with a new sweatshirt to go with new grey skirt and the Camel Thompson kilt skirt I had last month.

It's a simple thing that can be used to create outfits that work for me keying in with them plus shorts in a suitable gender fluid way.

I feel integrating a look across the whole of your expression rather than in effect having two different wardrobes makes much more sense.

I spoke early in the blog about not having anything exceptional when it came to comics when it comes to their gender direction and if anything some were very much masculine but in others the storylines were more targeted towards girls and their interests.

The Beano had Minnie The Minx and these days Rubi's Screwtop Science and The Dandy had Keyhole Kate and Beryl The Peril in they are reflected in this years annuals while past comic strips are in in the classic compilation from both.

I've been enjoying that Jinty I had for christmas  annual a lot for being the kind of a balance between where the more masculine side went with comics and the "forbidden" feminine for the lack of anything soppy and the sporty nature while including school based stories like the school play competition and the odd cookery feature.

It underscores why I belong in the set "feminine boy" because other than being born with a male body and being happy with it, that world is right where my mind is at enjoying my more Little Sissy side.

The balance tends to work for me and how I take that balance when I get away next month is something to be worked on as don't wish to have two totally different presentations with bits and bobs with lugging a case on a train with me.

It is a huge pity themed compilations like those D C Thomson do for the Beano and Dandy of the past aren't done for Jinty and Misty so we might have more of the best of what they had to offer.

Christmas and New Year Thoughts

This is more a joint a Christmas Day and New Years Eve post in one because really they all connect.

Christmas was marked with a Christmas Pause on my Tumblr accounts and Winnie The Pooh was chosen one one for the values A.A. Milne shows and Christopher Robin who was a boyhood inspiration in era where more overtly macho values were pushed.

Christmas Day was being with my parents but marked in a skirt and  white tights because I am and always was a Sissy Gurl and the conception of Tammy as from the original Friends Reunited original blogger identity was one that showed more of that Gurl, the boy by body with a feminine side me and this blog restored that right and centre in twenty twenty-one.

It avoided the agenda of others during that period and shortly afterwards in showing that as a transsexual thing but following a firmer little sissy gurl feminine with masculine traits one, making my own progress on a journey of my own choosing.

The other was the restoring of stronger more fitting feminine influences such as Jinty both in March's special of the redux for the twenty first century new characters and new stories for the originals with mysteries, sport and adventure and this Christmas with a period annual.

For Tammy then the encouragement and alignment with more harder "ballsy" tom boyish attitudes, determination and values within the sissy gurl forming one single coherent body and soul is the aim for this next year.

The reflective and thoughtful had always belonged but some boys as he become older by birth age had tried to push him away from that, but it was always a part of an eternal junior school boy and so influences and role models like Rupert The Bear came back with a new annual to read and enjoy.

The Beano and the Dandy were staple comics I read back then and while the Dandy no longer comes out as a weekly both have specials and annuals to this day so I had the twenty twenty-two annuals and a special themed compilation of older Beano and Dandy cartoon strips that reference artist endeavours by characters pas and present.

The main present was a BR 3F 0-6-0 "Jinty" locomotive number 47458 made by Hornby that can be played with like the all plastic set he had as a little infant boy.

I do have a need for a small paper diary even though it is (just) twenty twenty-one, a high tech computerized touch of a button era, and this is ideal linking past and present.

"Embrace new beginnings" could not be a more apt tag line for this little sissy embracing both their masculinity and femininity sides as one within a single sexual identity, that of a sissy no more or less being free to be me.

Christmas 2021

I don't think we've done many Christmas entries on this blog but I think we will but the first thing to bare in mind is for me I'm very much a child by emotions and development so a christmas for me is pretty much like the ones I had when I was a young boy.

Being that young boy meant chunks of my feminine side never got what they needed  and so this time around I have a Jinty annual from the past to enjoy a new given this was a comic I'd of loved to had been able to read back then.

I always liked the Beano but the modern Beano isn't so easy for me to get into so I had again an annual I'd had back then to enjoy for the connections it has to those bits of the past that are part of who I am.

The Dandy is different, sadly we don't have it as a weekly copy so I had this past edition because when we do get new stories in things such as the Summer Special, it's the characters I remember.

This is this years and it's not that different but has brand new stories and drawings to enjoy which I do. It and the Beano were the best co-ed comics.

Korky the Cat and Winker Watson co-present the Dandytown Winter sports competition which is featured besides regular cartoons by Corporal Clegg, Keyhole Kate and Desperate Dan just like they'd of been had the regular comic had outlived its seventy-fifth birthday in nineteen thirty-eight.

I've had been working sorting out my clothes as we are able to go out and spend time with friends away now compared with how things were last year, totally locked in and this is a past meats present thing being a SuperTed t shirt from the popular nineteen eighties tv children's cartoon printed today.

He's so cute I could have him with cream!

As a active feminine gurl I like to wear more feminine attire but when I'm playing or taking part in sports I'd sooner wear something that has less potential to show my undies while not having to wear shorts so I had this red skort to wear which much more me.

I struggle with being on top of things being both dyslexic, having very poor short term memory and autism so a really cute A5 Winnie The Pooh diary will help me run my life better.

This christmas has been more balanced for me being a sissy gurl able to be me with my parents.

Christmas edition

Well, we are taking a bit of a break on the blog because it is the best time of all for a little in just three days time and we have things to be doing and will no doubt have things to be playing with too to get get that wrapped up around the internet.

In this restored blog, much has been done and much more has been worked through from those early days , the period some tried to suggest I really was something else to the period we got back to what I am with the gender variance that goes with it between me and boys.

Happy to be in their company, I always knew I was too girly for girls and too effeminate for boys in some ways as much as I could play rough and tough games with them.

Christmas's were not always perfect for a lack of appreciation for how your expression and personal gender conception differed even though things that were broad such as the Dandy annuals were a great help.

These days it is better and while there remains some distance to be travelled before how some of us are, things are better such as the tolerance of pink, grooming which was frowned upon as a young boy as "sissy" and the new generation of boys who are pushing the boundaries being out about having a feminine side.

Why shouldn't I be out more as a sissy gurl too?

Happy Christmas!

Fresh starts

I have decided that there will be some changes around presenting coming in from the new year having spot some time looking at my wardrobe as it has been a good while since I first started exploring what being a adult little gurl for me involved.

Covid apart from what it did when came to mixing with people, visiting places and critically spending time with friends who do accept it even some don't "get it" affected that whole wardrobe maintenance side as with few places to go you don't look out, try on and evaluate your stuff.

It's hardly that I haven't dressed more down a traditional feminine route but the nature of some things like pinafore dresses were things I wore more with friends while away with them rather than in the house where I tended to wear skirts with tops if not short trousers.

Trying some things on showed even before covid a number of items only borderline fitted looking at pictures and really I want to wear things that do fit, make me feel pretty and smart from the inside out.

I want to look good as a sissy gurl.

Thus I have decide to prune the dresses down only to those whose fitting really flatters me and as they tend to be worn when away I honestly don't need several and if I need another to get one made and tailored to fit me exactly.

I am better served by tops, jumpers and sweatshirts whose sizes will fit me perfectly and matched to skirts that can also be easily got for a much smarter image.

Similarly some of the older socks can just go which are starting to show bobbling and as it was I actually found several new unopened pairs bought for going away in the summer of 2020 which of course never happened.

I can always look into things like white tights for a more sophisticated look if I wish but the point is going forward it's all for and about me being the best looking sissy gurl I can on my terms.

Anything that comes between that really is no longer needed to be around in this life.

Gender conception is overdue

" I often feel like the current model of gender (identity and expression) is far too inadequate to account for the lived realities of many gender nonconforming folks, particularly feminine boys.

Queer theory advanced a model of sociological gender performativity. That worked well for the past 30 years, thanks to Judith Butler, Ricki Wilchins, Leslie Feinberg, Holly Boswell, Kate Bornstein, and many other influential trans-feminists and transgender trailblazers.

That was fine, back when gender variance was still a very esoteric subject of study. We've now come a long way to better understanding that gender diversity is not so easily captured by the limited language of only gender identity and gender expression. I'd argue these two parameters alone barely scratch the surface of how cissexism itself is enacted by society. And it certainly doesn't account for the difficult process of coming out of the closet and embracing one's true self.

Consider the simplest example of a femboy that has to repress his feminine nature due to the overwhelming stigma and shame within his family or at his school, resulting in years of depression, anxiety, loneliness, and insecurity. Neither "identity" nor "expression" provides the necessary vocabulary to communicate that person's unique gender journey.

He's certainly not expressing his true self at all. If anything he's engaging in a conscious act of repression, given the overbearing weight of societal expectations dominating over his free will. And then there's his thoughts and feelings, which are inherently feminine albeit not visibly apparent. For transgender people, that state-of-mind could be readily described as a misalignment of gender identity. But that doesn't always work for gender nonconforming people, particularly if they do not conceptualize themselves as having a discrete "gender identity".

This is where gender conception comes into play:

gender conception (n) - the way in which a person looks, acts, thinks, or feels with respect to gender norms and ideals including appearance, behavior, mannerisms, speech patterns, emotions, interests, ambitions, pronouns, honourifics, forename, and subjective self-concept.

While gender expression and gender identity have proven useful for discussing the experiences of transgender and nonbinary people, gender conception affords a new paradigm by which gender nonconforming people can better communicate their own unique experiences.

***

Reply to question clarifying point:

Thanks for asking. Gender conception covers how a person looks, acts, thinks, or feels with respect to gender norms and ideals. It is therefore a spectrum of gender nonconformity that is distinct from gender identity, which is an internal sense of being a specific gender. It only has a slight overlap with gender expression in terms of appearance, behavior, mannerisms, and speech patterns. However, gender expression doesn't account for pronouns, honourifics, and forename (which are aspects of gender attribution) nor feelings, emotions, interests, and ambitions.

For example, I consider my sex to be male. However, I have a limp wrist, I have a lisp, and I speak with girly intonations. I tend to have a very sweet, sensitive, and bubbly personality. This would make my gender conception non-normative.

Question from user Ptowza_Potato

"How is that different than gender expression?"

Reply:

Feelings and thoughts and interests and ambitions are not gender expression. As a boy growing up, I always liked watching fantasy movies about princesses and unicorns, and they made me cry with happiness. I daydreamed about one day living in a fairytale wonderland where I could be a pretty princess and have my own unicorn. That is an example of a feminine gender conception, rather than gender expression."

*******

The quest of trying to find a model of gender that works for those of us who don't fit into a binary male or female set of boxes, who may experience gender fluidity and have gender variance has taken time as for understandable reasons much of the discussion started within the transsexual and crossdressing community for whom Gender Identity and Gender Expression were the prisms, it has been obvious does not work for feminine boys like myself.

User rkrause at the subreddit feminine boys posted the above on December 15 and that is the clearest concept of gender which is why it is reproduced as is.

Direct link: https://www.reddit.com/r/feminineboys/comments/rh43lu/gender_conception_is_long_overdue/